Asking for space in friendship, relationship or in any relation is not a negative thing but a positive outlook towards our own life and our mental wellbeing. We all have to understand that every person have their own life first then they become part of someone else’s life.
Space and freedom is not something to be asked for rather it is the essential cup of care that everyone deserves.
Giving space is the part of love, and love never denies anyone’s freedom!
“When someone give kindness to you, extend that kindness to somebody else”
I heard this quote few days back from a professor and it just touched me, like how beautifully it explains that kindness cannot be returned in form of materialistic things, it can only be extended to the ones who need it.
They say marks don’t matter, then why do only the students with the highest marks get their pictures in newspapers, hoardings, and even on school notice boards?
They say being healthy and happy is what matters at all, then why is someone happy with limited things called a coward who can’t take risks?
They say being beautiful doesn’t matters, then why do beautiful people get the most attention even by doing nothing at all?
They say money doesn’t matters, then why there is poor or rich kind of words exist in society? They say the incognito donation is great, then why do they put their donation’s video or photos on social media?
I think there is nothing that does not matter at all, everything matters in this world- the world of reality not fictional. Even if they want to celebrate failures in their speech and writings they only celebrate success in reality. Even if they fight for the rights of poor ones on the stage, they always outcast the poor ones backstage. Even if they praise inner beauty online they will only go for looks offline. Even if they encourage kindness on social media they don’t mind ignoring an injured animal while passing the road for their work.
Then why do they just pretend at all? Is it something that defines us all, or this is the only reality that everyone knows but does not want to see?
They say god is everywhere, but does god even want to exist in this kind of world? But god is in our hearts. Really? I mean if god is in our hearts then he must not be the god, because god cannot allow a heart where he lives to be so cruel or two-faced. The other face of us is very dangerous that even we can’t face it if shown.
So, everyone welcomes to the world where everyone is living two lives- one on stage and one backstage. Everyone around us is comforting themselves of being kind, religious, or genuine but in reality, they also know what their true identity is.
But who do we blame for this, our parents, our teachers, our elders, our friends, or our society? Because there was a time when we all are genuine and innocent (in our childhood) then how gradually do we become like this? The truth is we all just got influenced by the people or things that happened or happening around us, we just followed the things, but rarely questioned, or the ones who questioned later start minding their own business.
Sad isn’t it?
The reality is- On the track of changing the world, we let the world change us.
So, Hey there!
Can you try to decide which identity of yours you want to keep, not for the world but for yourself at least, maybe by this you can live not fancy but a genuine life for once.
You know, there are times when I question whether God has ever created a person on this planet who is faultless and never made any mistake. Or is it just me? Hahaha! Yes, I used to blame other people for all of the awful things that happened to me. This was a notion I had a few years ago. Up until the point when people started abandoning me, I had never really introspect myself.
ahm, Sometimes it was the situation, sometimes it was others, but in the end, it was always me. You know what my biggest flaw is? I realize things too late (when they start disappearing from my life), and the awful thing is that when they finally disappear, I start blaming them for their disappearance.
But let’s face it, we all make errors, so why is it so simple to place the blame on others while refusing to accept responsibility for them? Perhaps it is difficult for us to lift the lid of the jar that contains our flaws because we worry that if the world learned about them, people wouldn’t accept us, wouldn’t empathize with us, or would label us as greedy, fake, and other derogatory terms with which we used to cover up our flaws.
There’s a proverb that says, “Don’t make your mistakes your weakness; accept them and use them as a stepping stone to further development.” Then I begin to expand! Yes, I can finally breathe when I start acknowledging my faults, talking about them, and accepting them as part of who I am. I begin to realise that not only have others wounded me, but I have also injured others(either intentionally or unintentionally) and I have fouled up things. I am no longer frightened to accept my mistakes; instead, I am conscious of them and swear to never make the same ones again.
Making mistakes is perfectly acceptable, but blaming others for them is not. Instead of avoiding your mistakes, learn from them.
Life throw at us so many choices everyday, or we can say that we are always choosing new ones or justifying the ones that we already made.
Is it difficult to make a choice?
Hell yesss, it is. When I think back on my life, I remember those hard times when life literally threw some hard choices on me, and I was so worried at that time. But every choice I made back then has helped me grow as a person. At that time, it might have felt like I want something else, but now I realized that, that was exactly what I needed. As the saying goes, sometimes the right choice or decision doesn’t make you happy right away, but it turns out to be the best choice or decision for you in the long run and gives you peace.
Sometimes we choose things and sometimes things chooses us!
Remember that breakup when you were holding onto things tightly because you didn’t want them to end, but ultimately they slipped away since the other person didn’t want them?
Remember the time when you are at the center of your career/job choice and things didn’t worked according to you?
Remember the time when Some people cause/did wrong to you but you chose to stay calm and left things on karma?
Remember that friendship where you didn’t gave up even when things got difficult and didn’t go as you wish?
Remember the time when you lost/fail the opportunity that you wanted the most?
Do you regret them now?
No! and if yes you don’t have to. You are here because of those choices, your growth is because of those choices. That breakup teaches you to love yourself and not to depend or force other for love, it opens the door for the one who is actually made for you, that unwanted career/job proves to be true where after working on it you realized that you are actually good at it or may be after working on it you realized that you are good at something else, you find that something you enjoy working on, that decision to stay calm stops you from saying bad things and doing things that won’t make you feel better and will only make you feel worse. That friendship stays or doesn’t, but you worked hard to not lose that friend and regret later, that failed opportunity brings you a lot of new and better opportunities and teaches you how to deal with rejection or failure, or shows you where you went wrong.
Now when you look back you feel strong and happy about those choices, and it’s feel like god knew it and that’s why she chose those 10x better things for you. Those short term difficulties lead you here today, to the ultimate happiness and growth.
And its not the ending here, Life is a bundle of choices, we make choices everyday, some goes according to us and some opposite, but every choice justify itself at the end.
So, if you are sad right now because of the choice that you made earlier or you are regretting it, just don’t, take a deep breath and trust the process, it will surely leads you to the bright side where after you reach you feel good and grateful about the choice that chose you!
Hope the choice of reading this blog proves beneficial to you!!
I always wonder what the two lonely people do when they meet?
Do they just sit silently and gaze into each other’s eyes? Do they make the most noise? Or, do they spend time alone with one another?
Once upon a time, in the jungle, there lived a rabbit named “Muffin.” He prefers his own company and, despite his best efforts, he is never able to relax in the company of others. He gets annoyed by his own behavior at times, yet he also feels at peace with himself. He is often perplexed as to why he enjoys being alone but is unhappy when he is. Some other animals held a full moon party one day and invited Muffin as well, stating that everyone must attend or the king lion will eat them. Out of fear, Muffin went to the party and sat in the corner, watching other animals eat, dance, and sing, and then he tilted his head upward and saw the full moon shining brighter without stars, Muffin smiled and moved his head over to his left side, where he saw a baby bear (Tubby) eating berries while sitting under a tree. Tubby gave Muffin a smile when he spotted him looking at him, and Muffin returned the smile, feeling good and approaching Tubby to sit alongside him. Tubby gave him some berries, which he accepted, and the two of them ate them while gazing at the moon. Even though they didn’t say anything to each other that day, Muffin felt nice just sitting next to Tubby. The next day, they gathered at the same place to sit alone and eat. This goes on for several days, and they spend the most of their time together; sometimes they chat too much, and other times they just sit silently; quietness is something they both enjoy. One-day tubby asked muffin “how many friends do you have?” muffin replied “no one”. , tubby smiled and after a pause, he said don’t you ask me? muffin replied “hmm because the answer is the same”, tubby smiled brighter this time and then they start enjoying the berries again. Muffin still likes to be alone but this time he was happy being alone because he founds another loner tubby with whom he enjoys being alone.
The opposite is also said to attract humans, as it does in physics, and I’ve seen this in movies and heard from many people since my childhood. This may be true, but you know what, Sometimes all we need is a person like ourselves who is our mirror and sees right through us, who can understand us and even silence sounds like a deep conversation with him.
Liking solitude is a nice thing, but if you have someone with whom you are pleased and who enjoys solitude with you, then believe me, God has blessed you with the ultimate bliss.
Silently watching the world around you with someone,
People call it boring, but I think it’s the best peace anyone could have.
I used to believe that things heal completely with time, that they don’t hurt even a little after some time has passed, but today when someone mentioned something bad that happened to me in the past, I felt a kind of ache somewhere in my heart, and it feels like it still hurts somewhere, that it hasn’t fully healed.
Have you ever had a similar experience? Many of us, I believe, did. But why aren’t we able to recover from certain of our afflictions? Why are they still in pain? What are we going to do with them if they don’t get better?
We wrapped them in a bandage.
Yeah, some things really touch us from the inside, and we can’t just get over them even after a long period, so we just place bandages of hope on them and hope for the best. We never fully recover from the scars that some situations, terrible relationships, failures, or close ones have inflicted on us; instead, we simply want them to stop hurting us as much as they did before, so we put bandages on them. When those things came back in front of us or when someone mentioned them, we still felt the anguish of breaking trust, the pain of someone departing without cause, the pain of hoping for love and acceptance, and so many other forms of sorrow that are related to that wound.
Worst of all, we hand over the responsibility of protecting those bandages to someone new who enters our lives. Sharing is fine, but entrusting someone else with the burden of protecting your wounds or bandages is not. If things go bad with that person, or if that person leaves you, you’ll be left with nothing but unbandage wounds and one more wound to bandage.
There is a phrase that says you should never give someone else the key to your happiness; similarly, you should never give someone else the right to protect your wounds; it is your obligation to protect them in order to make yourself happy again. Yes, some things will never entirely heal, but we may strive to prevent them from hurting us again by wrapping them in sturdy bandages. Along with the bandage of hope to heal, we can apply the bandage of happiness and strive to learn from our painful past whenever it resurfaces.
Life is not an easy game, and one thing I’ve learned over the last 20 years is that we must accept responsibility for our joys, mistakes, and successes. Only in this way we will be able to prevent, not completely, but to a considerable part, adding fresh wounds within ourselves to heal.
Ever get into a situation when you have that feeling that the person in front of you is lying but you don’t want to hear the truth either because you fear that it can ruin your happiness or your bond with them?
Ever get into a situation when you feel like whatever things are going on is wrong but you don’t want to make them right either because you fear, it can affect you present, your happiness?
Ever get into a situation when you want to clear things with someone but you can’t because you fear that you will loose whatever you have with them either by clearing things and ultimately your happiness too?
Yeah you guessed it right! It’s our happiness and pleasure that stops us from seeing reality, accepting reality, accepting truth. The lies some people tell us are so comforting that we start lying to ourselves. Our true self continuously give us hint that something wrong is going on but we get so indulge in the things that we completely ignore those hints.
Choosing happiness is not wrong but choosing it at the cost of lies is really something that makes you suffer more in the future.
You know what’s the real danger is? It’s that if we hear enough lies, then we no longer recognise the truth at all. Those lies start comforting us in such a way that they become la la land for us that we don’t want to leave.
But hey there! I know may be you are facing the same thing, may be you are doing this for your happiness too, but for how long? One day reality will hit you so hard on your face that you might not even be able to handle. You know what, nothing is right or wrong in this world it’s us who choose right and wrong for ourselves. Whether or not anyone else stays with you but your instincts they are always be there with you and gives you hints about right or wrong. LISTEN! Yes listen them they will not comfort you with lie rather they will introduce you to that reality which will give you real long term happiness instead of fake short term pleasures.
My dear, stop hallucinating and start accepting reality.
Just got a text from my mum “had your lunch?” And I got a full cherry smile on my face, even though it was rough tough day but this lil care make the big difference and brought smile on my face.
There are many things in our life that are so little or u know common we can say but yet so special… These little things are like rose petals that one by one can make life a big beautiful rose flower. And you can make whole garden from them trust me haha.
It’s in our human nature that in search of big things we often ignore small things, some wishes to have that someone special who bring flowers for them but in that mean time they are ignoring that one stupid yet loyal friend who share his chocolate with them. We wait for someone’s reply to our text whole day and ignore the one who spare his time to call us. We want top grades in our exams and meanwhile ignores the learning that we are gaining by participating in other activities.
Hey there.. i know you get depressed some time or things don’t go in your way sometimes but trust me in your life too there are some beautiful little things on which you are not paying that much attention… Try to see them and feel them, trust me you feel more than happy and grateful. Problems will always be there, disappointments never leaves us but that doesn’t mean we start living in despair…. Even in the biggest disaster there are somethings that can make you feel grateful about.
List of things that can make someone feel good:
Texting your friend if they reached home safely or not can make them feel protected.
Talking to your elders and listening them can make them feel valued and comfortable. (It can makes their day too).
Offering food to street animals can make them and you both happy and grateful.
Listening to someone who is not feeling good can make them feel free and relieved.
Offering candy to a kid can bring smile on his face which can makes your day.. tadaa
And try this one for sure, give head massage to your mum, trust me she will give you Hundered and thousands of blessings even if you didn’t do it well, she will feel valued and loved and that eventually makes you happy too. (You can thank me later for this haha…)
These are very few you know, There are many more Little good things that you will find in your life once you start paying attention to them and living them.